His Needs, Her Needs

Have you ever heard the popular phrase, “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus” when discussing the differnces between men and women?  Of course, as many people know, that phrase comes from the title of the best selling book by John Gray, written in 1992.  While the title is often remembered, the subtitle, which is the essence of Gray’s book, is rarely, if ever cited.  That is, “A Practical Guide for Improving Communication and Getting What You Want in Your Relationships.”

The author’s focus is on the differences between behaviors and desires of men and women.  From there, the book centers on recognizing these differences and learning to communicate effectively to meet the needs of each party.  Understanding the expectations of one another, and communicating each others’ desires, are two keys to a successful relationship.

Yesterday, a fellow agent held me captive while recounting their latest adventure with a client of theirs, who had decided they wanted to “move on” and use another agent.  In this case, the clients had informed the agent that they believed the agent wasn’t meeting their needs.  So, now, it was time to find another agent, one that would do a “better” job of keeping them informed of “all of their options.”  According to the agent, the clients talked to the husband’s brother who provided them with valuable information their agent neglected to tell them.  From what my fellow agent said, the client’s brother provided a layman’s explanation of the need to make “back up” offers on properties they liked.  Specifically, back up offers on Short Sale properties they liked. 

Well, for those of us that have handled a few Short Sales - back up offers on short sales, while doable, probably aren’t the easiest road to success.  By the way, did I mention, the client’s brother has never had any training in Real Estate?  None, zero, zip!  Also, these clients wanted to be in a house as soon as possible.  So, as many of you know, ASAP and short sale are mutually exclusive.  In other words, you can’t get there from here.

After listening to the agent’s tale, I had to ask if they began their relationship with their buyer by doing a “needs assessment.”  Were expectations discussed before they began to look for homes?  If not, why not?  As happens in many real estate relationships, especially with buyers, the foundation that is necessary for a successful relationship is never established at the outset.  In the rush to run out and look at homes, the clients, and the agent, sacrifice the most important step that’s vital in establishing a successful relationship - business or otherwise.  And when things in the relationship begin to break down, it’s usually due to a lack of proper preparation. 

So, what should that initial needs assessment, or discussion of expectations consist of?

1.  Clear statement of clients and agents expectations.

2.  Ground Rules.  The What, Where, When and Why of the relationship.  This simply means a review, or preview of what the normal operational parameters are.  With expectations already discussed, this clarifies how you’ll look for homes, who will do what, when various parts of the transaction will take place, where things will take place, etc.  It’s simply a way of providing a clear picture to the client of the transaction from the outset to the settlement table.  No one likes surprises, an this should preclude that.

3.  A discussion of a Realtors responsibilities and our of Code of Ethics.  This isn’t an in-depth conversation, but simply a reminder to the client of the professional they’re relying on to make their transaction a smooth one.

Unmet client expectations are never helpful in business relationships.  To avoid them, it’s essential to clarify, from the beginning, in a manner understood by all, what’s to be expected from all parties involved.  While it may temporarily delay the buyer’s house hunting road trip, it’ll likely prevent misunderstandings or problems further down the line.  And in a Realtor’s business, where you aren’t compensated until closing, getting there is worth the reward.

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